Make New Friends, But Keep The Old

I learned that little jingle in the Brownies. I was a fair-weather Brownie, I joined only because I really wanted the shirt that said "Here Comes A Brownie" on the front and "There Goes A Brownie" on the back. I decided all too soon that those chicas weren't for me, after returning from an overnight camping trip without my Hello Kitty lunch bag. Little Brownie hoodlums.

One of the blessings and curses associated with the military is the opportunity to make new friends and to say many sad goodbyes to old friends. In small squadron communities like Sean's, we meet up with many of the same families at each assignment. It's wonderful to have that continuity and to reconnect with old friends despite so many location changes. It sounds cliche, but it is really one big family; everyone is either friends or friends of friends. You simply plug into the group when you arrive, and it's just like old times. Plus an extra kid or three.

This will be the second assignment where we're without a squadron community, and, to be honest, going it alone is hard! Making friends again is sort of like dating. I wasn't so great at dating when I was young, and I wince at the thought of dating again at this age. People in this area have been here for years. I get the feeling that people who put down roots and live in the same place forever aren't really looking to make new pals, they're happy with the friends that they have, so it seems twice as hard. 

I'm doing all of the normal getting involved basics-- joining a church, meeting the neighbors, talking to anyone who looks like they will listen. I have also checked out some of the groups on meetup.com, but I'm without a car or furniture, so I hesitate to host anything in our empty house. Air mattresses and makeshift furniture are fairly common when you're waiting for overseas shipments to arrive, but it still seems like a strange first impression, right?

Yesterday, a girl was riding her bike near where I was running and she fell over. My first instinct was to ask her if she was ok, and to help her get up, but then I noticed she was similiar in age to me and I went into slimeball dating guy mode, wondering if I should ask for her number. And maybe do the partial-stretch-to-arm-around-the-shoulder move.

Like dating, it's all about being in the right place at the right time. Because Teague is riding the bus, and I have no car, I cannot stalk the moms at the school (yet!) but I have tried to seek out places, such as the community center where I can run into ladies to befriend. I also spend a lot of time in the kid section of the local grocery store.

Friendship is the first step to feeling settled, and to getting the low down on all of the critical questions that a new gal would have about the area, like: Where can I get good highlights? Who babysits? & Why are there so many side panel vans in this neighborhood?

As I'm navigating this new community, I'm keeping in mind that, like dating, it's when you least expect to meet someone that you do. The next time I'm having a lengthy conversation with the elderly lady across the street, I will ask her if she knows of anyone that she can set me up with. You never know...